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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29297337">There's A Needle in the Haystack</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TransBunnyRabbit/pseuds/TransBunnyRabbit'>TransBunnyRabbit</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>"I Love You, Javi" [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The New Frontier, The Walking Dead, season 3 - Fandom, twdg</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Boys In Love, Brother/Brother, Brothers Actually Get Along, Confessions, Confused Gabe, Controlling David, Custody Battle, David Loses Custody Of Gabe, David and Javier Share A Bed, Divorce Issues, Dubious Consent, M/M, Relationship Negotiation, Retired Veteran, Sibling Incest, Unsure Javier, resolved issues</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 06:55:06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,704</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29297337</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/TransBunnyRabbit/pseuds/TransBunnyRabbit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Part Two Of The 'Heart(Just His Brother's)' Oneshot.<br/>After ten years hense the custody battle and mere moments after Javier's feelings were taken out on his brother. They had forgotten about them and tried to move forward in their lives until a certain something happened.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>David García &amp; Gabriel García (Walking Dead), David García &amp; Kate García, David García/Javier García, Gabriel Garcia &amp; Kate Garcia, Javier Garcia &amp; Gabriel Garcia, Javier García &amp; Kate García</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>"I Love You, Javi" [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2136906</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>There's A Needle in the Haystack</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When you think of a soldier, you don't think of someone who cares about their own safety. It's a harsh reality that many children, parents, or spouse had to deal with. No one would like to think about the possibility that any small indication could lead them to the horror of those they've lost. Any notification, any knock on the door, any phone call, could be the time.

</p><p>”You think about it every single day! I told you already Javier, I will be fine! I’m fucking grown, I can do shit by myself!”

</p><p>“I don’t care what you think you can do, I just….I don’t want ot lose you too. Gabe can’t take that. He’ll be devastated-”

</p><p>“He doesn’t even call anymore and you fucking know that, don’t act surprised. Surely, you know how many times I’ve tried calling him. Even texting-”

</p><p>“I need you to be here with me. I knew this was a bad idea helping you sign up for the military.” Hands and fingers digging into his own face from the sheer panic he felt, David regulated him with a fast grip on his shoulders.

</p><p>“Hey, stop that shit man, you gotta stop thinking like that. Remember what mama said.”

</p><p>“I don’t want to remember what she said-”

</p><p>“You worry about it more and think like that, then it might happen.” Shoulders resting against the ragged fingernails, looking at his older brother with a short timed gaze.

</p><p>“Please, David, Just be safe out there. I need you to stay down on earth with us, please.”

</p><p>“Javi…You know how slim the chances of that is. My job is risky as hell. Always working on things that could kill someone in the blink of an eye.”

</p><p>“Don’t make me think of that…” Javier’s back pressed the fridge’s handle, in the middle before clicking the side of it with a subtle merge from his hip bone.

</p><p>“Javi. Face it and just deal with it, okay? And plus why didn’t you answer the phone when the service called? They told me that it took three calls before you finally answered, even said you sounded scared when you talked.” Upon trying to come closer, Javier’s body slid from the fridge to get out of the corner-able and vulnerable stance he was currently in.

</p><p>“I...I thought.. I-I thought they had bad news. About you, of course. I thought they were gonna tell me that you...Y-Y’know..”He crossed his arms like the little younger brother he was, David rolled his eyes and turned the other way.

</p><p>“I ordered for you not to worry about me.”

</p><p>“I know but, I-I...I just... I can’t afford to lose you as well D-David.” He shook his head while the latter only tilted his face towards Javier.

</p><p>“I’ll be fine. I promise you that. I’m A-Okay.” Taking his petite hermano’s hand, he rubbed the outer layer of knuckle and upper phalange skin, the only thing that Javier could do was look on and sigh as David chuckled.

</p><p>“Just like Tio Hector, always worrying.” Watching Javier smile and eyebrows furrow at that, he came even closer this time but even though they knew what would happen (And surely wanted it,) Javier resisted the urge to lock lips with his brother.

</p><p>“You can’t promise something without full guarantee, I don't like lies.” Javier snarled as the smile vanished in milliseconds, David nodded slowly.

</p><p>"I know."

</p><p>The holding, first place, golden awarded spot for heartbreaking devastation was always the parents, but in the Garcia family, it was the brother. The sibling, the younger sibling, Javier Garcia. He was known for stressing, calling his older brother nonstop every day he would get t a payphone. Hours and hours spent on buying his favorite cargo pants or even combat boots, he knew he wasn't supposed to he sending gifts but he couldn't help himself.

</p><p>“Javi? Hey, I didn’t expect you to call so late at night.” Rubbing his eyes from the tiredness that was slithering into his bones, he felt Javier’s weighted and heavy lifted sigh flood the room.

</p><p>“So sorry! I didn’t know you would be sleeping. You usually stay up in the nights.” Sitting up on his funded mattress, he checked the little timer that sat on the wooden stool like his bed, it was 12 pm.

</p><p>“That was back when I didn’t have to get up so early, in short, back when I wasn’t in the army Javi.” Hearing his brother laugh, he growled into the phone that was catching the sweat between small icons on his phone.

</p><p>“Whatever, I just wanted to check up on you and tell you I got you something. Another, something.”

</p><p>“Ohh, what is it this time out of the fifteen things that you got me before?”

</p><p>“How’d you know it was a gift?!” 

</p><p>“How could I not? If I played dumb you would’ve asked how I DIDN’T know.” Flopping on his side, he observed the clock as it turned to 12:01 pm.

</p><p>"Shut up! I got you some boots, size 11, don't worry I got black this time. What's the new barrack address?"

</p><p>"How'd you know that I switch?" Seriousness etched into his facial features.

</p><p>"I asked the recruitment office why my box of chocolates wasn't sent directly to you."

</p><p>"You sent fucking chocolate?" His words were ridden with Javier's forward anger.</p><p>Valentine’s Day was coming up, how could I not get you something?” Javier’s sound was cutting in and out, barely being able to hear the rest of that sentence.

</p><p>“Uhm, because you’re my brother?”

</p><p>“Don’t start this argument.”

</p><p>“Yea, I wouldn’t like to start it either, we… We don’t talk about what happened.”

</p><p>“Trying to forget it ever happened I see. Aren’t you such a good brother?” He sounded sick to his stomach and so did David. Even though they tried forgetting about what had happened between them that night of David finally coming back, it always stuck in the back of their minds.

</p><p>There was a moment of brief silence between the two of them, what they had done together on that night should have stayed IN that night. Why didn’t Javier understand that most? He didn’t want to be remembered of how he kissed and hugged his own brother, his own blood, his own family.

</p><p>“You know you're not supposed to be sending me gifts Javier.”

</p><p>“I can’t help it, I saw them in the store today and I couldn’t help but to think, what would David think of them?” He heard David’s arms shift in the matter, legs flailing to the side of the bed so he could fully stand.

</p><p>“You’re going to have to, if the guys see me getting gifts from my brother in the barracks, that shit’s gonna be a little embarrassing.” He whispered as to hearing Javier laugh on the other side of the phone.

</p><p>“Why do you let them see your mail that comes in?”

</p><p>“I don’t. They go through it and hand it out to the men in Alphabetical order.” Briskly looking under the cot of his, grabbing a bottle of water amongst all the others and twisting the cap off of it.

</p><p>“Then just get it fast enough so they won’t see.” "

</p><p>Javier, it’s not that simple.” David began as he drank from the water bottle, setting it down by the third leg of the cot, Javier’s huffs of protest surely weren’t unheard.

</p><p>The older latter had to reassure him that everything was going to be okay, especially after the incident with the custody battle. David had been pretty ruthless, Javier on the other hand was still surprised that the judge deemed David unfit for parenting Gabriel. He didn't mind it, at least he pretended that he didn't. And now looking back at it ten years later, he understood why the judge did it.

</p><p>“David, you’re acting like you don’t care again. Don’t be like this.” Javier swung his fist at David’s shoulder as David angrily tilted his head to his brother.

</p><p>“What? I don’t know what you’re going on about but I know it’s not what’s right.”

</p><p>“David, don’t act like you don’t know it too. Ever since Gabe was taken away-”

</p><p>“DO NOT BRING HIM UP.” Slanging his limbs down on the forearm of the table, eyes staring wide in the instance, Javier repelled himself back to not get in the way of David’s arriving wrath.

</p><p>“It has something to do with him. I know it does, it has to. Still not over it huh? I’m not either. Believe it or not, we’re hurting together.” Javier crowded himself to the other end of the room, David’s bruised, balled fists punched at the open air in front of him, trying to land one on his brother but failing.

</p><p>“WILL YOU SHUT UP ALREADY?!”

</p><p>“No, because you need to hear this. I’m not the best at this kinda stuff, especially when I don’t know what it feels like but if I could pour out my heart into a bowl, it’d be overflowing man. I miss that kid. Just like you, too.” Head raining lower with the more he talked about him, that sweet boy, just like his stubborn father, handed off to that horrendous woman, Kate. His brother’s arms left the widening touch of sadness without any resort. Only contorting to his mind was then when he crashed down on the sofa and sob into his open palms.

</p><p>“It sucks. It really does suck. But hey, what about asking for home visits?”

</p><p>“She placed a restraining order against me, Javi. I can’t see Gabe, talk to, nor even be more than five feet in range from him.” The low voice filled with cracks here and there, Javier sat beside him and wrapped him up in an infectious blow of warmth.

</p><p>“Maybe try to sort it out with her, if you can’t, I’ll even try to. I don’t mind getting a few punches or slaps from her.” Javier smiled as David chuckled, his sobs dying from the enclosing silence of Javier’s house.

</p><p>“Don’t try. She won’t even answer to you. Nor to any Garcia. Except for my little Garcia, mi mijo..” He trailed off in the thoughts of the unknown.

</p><p>David had a horrendous record with the law. In domestic abuse, assault, battery, attempted murder. Deeming him worthy of a child would be the worst news for everyone in this situation. Refusing the parenting classes that were offered to him, he couldn’t step foot near his son or be around any nursing parents in public again. He ended up moving in with Javier which helped a lot but stressed-out his younger brother. When David decided that he would relist in the army. He still wondered how someone with his leveled skill set and complex criteria could be so stubborn about his family.

</p><p>He still remembered when he said those words, those infuriating nine words that killed and decimated any hope for the future. He couldn’t stand it, neither could Javier. Sitting in the chair amongst and in the front of the others that examined the case in front of them.

</p><p>‘I deem you unworthy of Gabriel Garcia, David Garcia.’

</p><p>He couldn’t take it at that. Even attempting to attack and physically harm the judge. Javier, of course, had to hold him back because of this he was almost arrested. Thank god for Javier saying he was provoked, even though it wasn’t true, David had felt like he had been provoked and Javier knew it.

</p><p>But as much as Javier wanted to be on David’s side, he couldn’t. For legal reasons and the very tragic ones. David’s charges played a big role in trying to get his child back. He wouldn’t say it to David, but maybe this was for the best. Maybe this was needed for David to open his eyes and realize that he had to care more for his own life. Refusing his brother’s knowledge on how he actually feels, he talked to Kate about it. Not the best choice but someone else except his brother right now would be amazing.

</p><p>“I don’t mean to be an ass or anything but, do you think the judge was trying to Gabe a favor? Personally, maybe he was trying to spare Gabe from the possibility of him getting hit.” Ironic in terms of future events.

</p><p>“Honestly, I don’t really know Javi. I tried taking it slow, I tried being friendly as hell in that courtroom, and what does he do? Tries to attack the damned judge?!” She sipped the edge of her sweating Burger King cup.

</p><p>“He’s got an anger thing, we all have seen it in the works, but like that? There was no need for that AND it was uncalled for.” He pointed to the table they had been sitting at as Gabe shoved his earphones in his ears.

</p><p>“I know. I can’t believe that I married him.”

</p><p>It may be well off with his sweet cradling every time he came back from a year of being away. Being on duty was one thing but seeing his brother was an entirely different perception. He had yet to figure this out. Coming back to a steaming home-cooked meal, clean house, folded and washed clothes, but mostly to come home to his hermano. He was the real caretaker, the real man in the house, the real Soldado. He may not fight, he may not shoot, nor travel, nor load bullets into a gun, nor throw explosives into trenches, but, a person doesn’t always have to do such things to be considered a hero.

</p><p>"Hey, Javi, I'm home-, oh my..." He stopped himself, the doorknob was soonly paid no mind as he looked around the living room with his bags by his sides. 

</p><p>The living room was spotless. He never could judge but, when he and Javier lived with their mama and papa, Javier was a slob, now he finally was cleaning up and making it look presentable, but where did this inspiration come from? It wasn't like this when they had kissed that night all those years ago. 

</p><p>"Hey! D-David! I was wondering where you were! Go ahead and put your bags in the washroom, I'll get them in a minute!" 

</p><p>"I can wash my own clothes. You don't have to-" Javier was already rushing inside of the living room with a black apron banded against his waistline and two black oven mitts on his petite hands. He looked adorable if David was being honest. Gripping the bags despite his mitts, he dragged them into the back of the washing room beside the master bedroom.

</p><p>"You should sit down, rest. I'm cooking tamales." He gave his bright smile as David chuckled and sat down on the couch nearby.

</p><p>"Ni siquiera comes tamales.(You don't even eat tamales.)" 

</p><p>"Cierto, pero, Los hice para ti.(True, but, I made them for you.)" Continuing on with his cooking, David's face went red after he had said that.

</p><p>"And even the Carpet, it's dusted and vacuumed, you must have been happy today." He joked while Javier scoffed.

</p><p>"Everything BUT happy. I worried about you, cleaning the house was the only thing that could settle me." Javier's chipped pan wiggled around on it's side, hearing the springs from the couch rise. His older brother was coming to greet him with open arms, a plain happiness graved into his features.

</p><p>"Oh? Then I may have to keep you worrying. You need to clean your house more, keeps you from turning this place into a pig stock."

</p><p>"Softening me up?" He pulled back as David shook violently.

</p><p>"N-No, n-no, not at all. I just... I missed you, again." Snaking his short limbs around his brother, he laid his head down on his back.

</p><p>"I missed you too my lov- h-hermano." Javier's weak smile slipped, breaking free from his brother's hold.

</p><p>The welcoming of his brother’s sweet, vanilla, scents, a grand opening to the exerting reality blasting him in the face. The sprouting core of his gravitating love for his hermano wouldn’t cease, and with the lack of how David gave up on his grasp of what right from wrong, those feelings exported themselves out through the time that the both of them had spent in Javier’s house.

</p><p>“It always smells good in here, you know how to make it wonderful.” David waved his arms around Javier’s mid section, he curved away quickly.

</p><p>“Thank you, I’ve been taught by the best~” Snickering, the latter sighed and pat his brother’s tailbone though Javier once again moved away.

</p><p>Maybe he was finally realizing that this was wrong and he didn’t want him to do this anymore? Maybe he was in love with someone else and he didn’t want to cheat on his lover with his own brother? Maybe he just didn’t love him anymore?

</p><p>“Hey, I was thinking maybe we could..Go out tonight? Together?” His hands reaching out for Javier’s elbow was met with a grave look on the younger’s face.

</p><p>“Why’s that?”

</p><p>“I mean, all you do is stay home and stress, cook and clean. Plus, I was wondering if you would…” He slightly pulled a small baseball keychain from his pocket, Javier’s eyes going wide.

</p><p>“A-And...W-What’s that for? Why are you g-giving me gifts?”

</p><p>“Appreciation, hermano, and the other very fairly obvious reasons.” Struggling to keep his impulse to just kiss him right there was something he almost failed at doing twenty other times before.

</p><p>“David, we don’t do that anymore. We can’t, I made a mistake back then, okay?”

</p><p>“Yeah, no shit sherlock, but i’ve been..I’ve been so confused lately in the way you’re presenting stuff to me. When you meant to send that box of chocolates to me, was it in a loving manner? Y’know...More than a...b-brotherly love?”

</p><p>“I….” He reminded himself that he had done that. Back when he was still searching for the inappropriate love for his brother, the satisfaction from his brother’s kisses, the joy from his cuddling, the moans and the heavy breathing that surfaced on that one night.

</p><p>“Whether you want to admit it, I already know it. You still thought that I wanted to, didn't you?” He didn’t answer that question, he stood amazed by the wall of the close fridge, speechless and confused about his own feelings. David was correct like he ‘Always Was’.

</p><p>“Y-Yea, I did. But it wasn’t because I wanted you to love me back. I wanted to know you were still...That you still cared about me.”

</p><p>“Same thing.”

</p><p>“Not in the slightest. I don’t wanna have to explain the difference, Davy.”

</p><p>“Don’t call me that.”

</p><p>“Then don’t make me have to explain something that you should know by now.” He ran off into his room while David snorted under his breath.

</p><p>“Hey, don’t run away from me!” David ran after him but he had slammed the door in his face. David stood outside the room with a bad aura, banging his open palm on the door’s upper.

</p><p>He remembered those long times ago when they first had tried it. When Javier made the big jump because David didn’t want to. Back when he had common sense, or, both in this matter. It wasn’t right to just single out one for those intentions and infectious feelings of one considered family. He had thought it wasn’t right back then, he thought it was vile too, he didn’t want to but something about the feelings they had for each other just couldn’t stop making themselves known to the world. He didn’t back off now, but since then, things had been pretty steady between the two brothers, they stopped only to start up again ten years later after the court case was said and done.

</p><p>Though the life he was living was great, he wanted to fully retire from the military and spend every penny on Javier like Javier did for himself. It would be the best day ever when he’d tell Javier he wouldn’t have to work anymore. All he needed to do was play baseball and live his merry life. He also had told him that he was like a housewife. Now that the younger sibling realized it, he was always cooking or cleaning, even when they were to lay opposite of each other in their separate beds of the same room, he’d get up and start sweeping or dusting just so he would feel good. He honestly liked it a lot, it gave him something to do other than stress and worry about David every year he was away for.

</p><p>Awaking from a dead sleep, David heard the sound of a roaring vacuum cleaner in the room. Eyes straining to try and make out who the hell would be up at this time in the darkroom, he was able to see a peaking light from the crack of the closed door leading to the living room. Grunting slightly, he got up and stretched his legs and his arms, then slowly made his way to the door, hands pressing his back while he opened the door only to see his brother vacuuming the hell out of the living room’s white carpet.

</p><p>“Why the fuck are you vacuuming at one in the morning?” He asked as his brother didn’t hear him the first time, he sighed and walked to the behind of his little brother, poking him in the sensitive spot, the middle of his spine. He jumped quickly before turning around and smacking him on the cheek. On reflex, he slapped back.

</p><p>“O-Oh! D-David!”

</p><p>“Why’d you smack me?” David grinned while Javier chuckled and turned off the vacuum.

</p><p>“You scared me, why aren’t you sleeping?” Javier wrapped the cord around the small hanger of the vacuum cleaner’s backside, David helped reel it in.

</p><p>“Why are you up vacuuming?” David snatched the cord back, Javier fell lightly into David’s arms, erecting his back upwards to get away from a horrible chance that David could take.

</p><p>“Really?”

</p><p>“Eye for an eye.” David winked while Javier’s steaming cheeks could never be passed through his brother’s eyes.

</p><p>“I needed something to get my mind off of...When you leave again.”

</p><p>“I’m not leaving again.” He smiled, watching Javier do the quickest turn he’s ever seen.

</p><p>“H-Huh?”

</p><p>“I’m retiring, Javi. I’m not leaving you again.” Seeing the amount of weight lifted from his brother’s shoulders was wonderful. He had finally relaxed, fully and truthfully.

</p><p>“A-Are you seriously?! A-And like, s-staying out t-this time?!” Dropping the handle of the vacuum cleaner, it stood on its own while Javier gripped his brother’s wrist, wiggling them around a bit.

</p><p>“Yes Javi, I’m not going anywhere anymore.” He gave him the tightest bear hug that a young baseball player could ever give, he was so awfully happy to hear this news, David also being happy to deliver this news was ecstatic.

</p><p>“Best part is, they’ll still pay me, so you don’t have to worry about money, you can quit your job. I’ll be paying for everything from now on with my retirement checks.”

</p><p>“You’re lying.”

</p><p>“No lies here, hermano.”

</p><p>“David you know you can’t lie about this type of stuff, you know how I feel about it, don’t.”

</p><p>“Don’t what? I told you the truth. There’s a reason why I brung more bags than usual.”

</p><p>“Oh my god-” His body was pulled into a low fingering gaze of the tailbone and of the eyes.

</p><p>“Though I couldn’t care any less about the money, nor the time, I just want to be around-” Before he could finish, Javier kicked him on instinct in the stomach. He fell to his knees in gargling pain, squinted eyes as he clenched his stomach.

</p><p>"Not in that way, y'know." Javier shied away from him.

</p><p>And once again, when David thought he couldn’t be any happier with the current things he had in his life, he had got a call from Gabriel the next day he had fully retired from military service. Gavin reported Kate to the police for smoking and snorting cocaine in front of him. She also allegedly hit him in the matter as well. She was finally redeemed unworthy of the rights from Gabe’s custody, he was successfully given over to the only person whom had a nack for responsibility, Javier. David was ancy about Javier having legal custody of his son but he couldn’t really do much about it. He was just happy to have Gabe with him once again.

</p><p>The house that Javier had wasn’t big, but only big enough for one person, meaning that David and Javier had to share a bed so Gabe didn’t have to choose between sleeping with his father or his uncle. It helped the two brothers become more closer than they had ever been before David soonly changed in mood.

</p><p>Gabe had the ability to press charges on his stepmother, they could finally end this stupid battle between the ex Sister-In-Law. Though, he did not. He blessed mercy upon her, even though she hit him with a glass cup. It may have stabbed him to no end that his son didn’t want to put her through hell, usually, children's minds go to the extreme because they don’t actually know what they're doing. She was set free with house arrest and probation. Javier could say that he had the perfect nephew any aunt or uncle could wish for. He didn’t like violence, unlike his father, would thrive for. It was hard to believe that Gabe was even his son.

</p><p>When David had begun to change, he was focusing more on the things that actually mattered, now that he was a full-time father and a full-time brother of a wonderful boy whom he can finally lay in the same bed with again. Like Gabe’s treatment options, for the last ten years, he had been treated welly by Kate for five and then after another custody battle, another five years by his uncle and his father. He could say that Javier was doing the majority of the work, David was just paying for the bundles of medications.</p><p>This one time though, out of the blue finally, David had mustered the bravery to be able to try and remake what the two of them had and what each had tried to restart through the ten years of waiting. He had invited Javier out bowling while Gabe was visiting his friend's house. It was made for a bigger intention than he let on.

</p><p>'Let me show you a good time, we haven't celebrated like this in over a year, c'mon, I'll even buy you a beer.' 

</p><p>That wasn't the only thing he wanted to give Javier, but he wanted to pay him back for everything he had done. Thanks to Javier, he had a closet full of vests and flannels, boots, and even shirts that costed more than he could imagine. But even though the clothes seemed nice, hanging out with him and spending quality time with him was nicer.

</p><p>He wanted to spend every inch of time with Javier, show him that he didn't care about the clothes nor the money, nor the cost of the house or how clean it was. All he cared about was trying to make things work between the two of them. He wanted him so badly, he wanted to degrade his brother's body with kisses and tongue licking, he needed to feel his brother's lips on his skin, he HAd to. Maybe the two could make amends meet and try it out once again, but this time, they would have to be private, if it were to work out.

</p><p>When he had arrived at the bowling alley, David brought him a rose for a hint at what he was seeking. Though Javier picked up on it, he didn't say anything about it, he kinda blew it off, which only angered David. Through the bowling, David had been doing his hardest to show Javier that he wanted something more than their brotherly love. Buying the drinks and the food, opening the car door when he got out, pushing him in his seat, handing the bowling balls to him, even going as far a to help him change out of his bowling shoes. Javier knew there was a problem with this picture. David never helped him with anything, not even the checks or being helped get out of the car. So this was very different for the two of them.

</p><p>Nothing could really change how he felt about David, he wanted something more but he knew he couldn't have it. David was right back then, he wasn't supposed to be doing this. And was it just him, or had David been softer and nicer towards others and Javier himself? Was he dreaming or seeing things? It was hard to tell sometimes. He was a devilishly secretive person. He didn't complain about a single thing, was well behaved, treated everyone well. Something that he couldn't help to think was how fast he was willing to change for his brother. There were no second thoughts, no questioning, no answers given to why. It was just, 'Poof! Here's A Changing David!'

</p><p>After their bowling came to an end, the two picked up a sleeping Gabe and went back to Javier's house. Only then did David try anything physical with his brother like last time. Resting Gabe in the opposite bed pushed against the left wall of the room, Javier and Davis stayed up. Javier tried offering him a smoke but he declined. He meant it when he said that last time was his actual last time. So instead, the two boys sat down in the kitchen drinking their warm beers. David would inch closer with each time he took a sip, though, Javier wouldn't be that inclusive to the idea. He sat away, trying to keep his distance, trying to stop himself from wanting this more than David did. He even pushed David off of him when he had came way too close.

</p><p>"Javi. don't be like this." He tried sliding himself moreover but only resulted in Javier getting up to get another beer even though the one he had wasn't done yet. 

</p><p>"Don't be like what?" He clicked the cap off a new, sweating beer from the refrigerator of his own.

</p><p>"You've moved every single time I try to reconnect us." The beer Javier had just got was set on the table in front of David as David just turned his head to look at his little brother.

</p><p>"We already are connected, what do you mean?" Javier smiled at him as David's eyes were beginning to get glassy, Javier could see it and feel it. The thickness in the air and the wall made of fragile glass.

</p><p>"Stop it." David couldn't help but to be angry with him, this was something they had done before. Javier had tried reconnecting their bonding relationship before, but all of a sudden now when David tries, it's a problem? He truly didn't understand Javier sometimes.

</p><p>Javier turned to him and gave him a push, it wasn't friendly, nor was it for fun, there was a purpose behind that physical portray.

</p><p>"We don't do that anymore." Javier's watched his brother rise from the chair and knock the seat over.

</p><p>"You tried doing so the first-fucking five years before everything went good. What's with the random change?!" 

</p><p>"Because I realized that it was wrong and it was just...Fucked." Javier shrugged his shoulder blades back while David squinted at him.

</p><p>"Fucked?! FUCKED?!"

</p><p>"YES. BECAUSE IT IS DAVID, DO YOU NOT SEE?! WE ARE BLOOD BROTHERS!" Javier screamed while they heard the crack of the door open, it was Gabe. He had been too loud and had awoken the little son of his brother's.

</p><p>"What are you doing Javi?"

</p><p>"Nothing, go back to sleep buddy." Javier drunk from the beer's open cap, David sitting back down.

</p><p>"You and dad were arguing about something, I'm not a child anymore, I need to know what's going on!"

</p><p>"What Javi and I talk about, isn't something that your age group needs to hear. Focus on school buddy." David patted his cheek but Gabe tore away.

</p><p>"N-No, I-"

</p><p>"Gabe, please. I assure you, everything is okay." He gave him a very fake smile but Gabe didn't know the difference. All he knew was that he was being held from critical information. In seconds, he fled to the shared room, a flick of anger painted on his features.

</p><p>"Gabe..." Outstretching his arm, but David however pulled him back.

</p><p>"Let go, David."

</p><p>"Not until we're outside." David slung him outside, he gripped the staircase of his backyard, the latter closing the door while the younger roset o his feet.

</p><p>"What do you want?" Javier crossed his arms while David gave him that look, that, 'You Know What', look. 

</p><p>"Don't play dumb Javier, you know exactly what I'm looking for in you, for you." David lessened and toned himself down, watching Javier's tight arms loosen as well. 

</p><p>"We already talked about this man, I'm not looking to repeat this. We can't do this, how many times do I have to reject you?" 

</p><p>"Then stop rejecting me and I'll stop asking." David joked while Javier chuckled lightly. thought the laugh couldn't distract him from the huge problem that was starting to rise and had already been developed. Back given to the latter, he drifted his fingers along the sides of the baseball cage, he followed after.

</p><p>"Seriously David? You know we can't do this." Javier waved his hand in front of his chest but David didn't care, pressing his chest against Javier's open palm and grabbing the wrist, slowly skimming it downwards.

</p><p>"We can try Javier, just like we did last time."

</p><p>“We won’t, I won’t, at least. So please drop it, okay?” Javier kicked the side of the cage while David grabbed his shoulders front the back.

</p><p>"I will not drop it, I want you to just...Be mine.” David complained even more but his eyes told a different story. There was not much that he could have done, he couldn’t really force him to have a relationship with his own brother. What type of relationship would be based on false endearment and untrue doting?

</p><p>“David, I can’t.” It was like breaking the ice when the other wasn’t ready, like saying a pick-up line to the other who wasn’t interested. David couldn't get it through his head that he was the one fucking their relationship over.

</p><p>“Yes, you can.” Now it just sounded desperate, highly desperate. Something that he wanted his brother to do for him, it seemed like he only cared for himself and not for what his brother wanted.

</p><p>“Will you stop trying already, David?! I don’t want to! It’s wrong a-and, I-I...I just-”

</p><p>“Think about it Javi. Everything we’ve done together. We've slept in the same bed, we’ve cuddled each other, we’ve literally kissed each other! I can’t deal with you being away from me. I need to feel your kisses, your heat, your body on mine Javier, I-I...I need to know that you’re here to stay, with me Javi, please.” There were danger signs everywhere over this. He just didn’t seem to see them, or even tell they were there, maybe even ignore them, sure.

</p><p>“N-No David! I-I...I want to, okay?! I-I really do, but it’s...I-It’s bad!” Overdramatic hands flapping in the air in David’s direction, though, he didn’t seem to care because he just kept on his stride over to his brother.

</p><p>“We gave up on what was right and wrong a long time ago and you fucking know that.” David’s eyebrows didn’t miss a beat with his well-spoken sentences, clasping the outer rimming edge of his nostrils, a little angry to hear such a thing.

</p><p>“That’s why I’m trying to correct it before it goes further into the deep end David!” He was so glad he didn’t have neighbors because if so, they'd have some furious things to say to the two of them.

</p><p>“What’s there to correct?! Everything’s like it should be!” A raging glance over his body proved his furious intent to be real, nothing of a fake occurrence.

</p><p>“David…” Javier cried out as he felt soft tears roll down his cheeks. This was terrible.

</p><p>“Javi, please. I beg of you. Let us be, I know it may seem wrong but that doesn’t mean that it’s not right either.” He must have thought he was smart when he said that, since this bitch was smiling.

</p><p>“That didn’t make any sense.” He laughed a little while David wiped away his tears, cupping his brother’s left cheekbone, alleviating down into his brother’s, latter palm.

</p><p>“You get the fucking point, that’s all that matters.” David grinned while Javier just gazed at him and smiled but tried to pull back, though David's palm was too strong and kept ahold of him.

</p><p>"W-We need to get inside." Javier tried to combat the other forearm curling around his spine, the heat between the two almost merging into one with how close they had been.

</p><p>"We'll go inside when I say we go." Leaving a small peck on Javier's forehead, the younger's pupils shrunk to the small amount of warmth pressed against his temple, covering his forehead immediately after.

</p><p>"You're such an ass." 

</p><p>"A damn fine one too, and, I'm YOUR ass." He dug his face in Javier's neck while he stiffened, but laughed, hugging his brother back.

</p><p>"Callente tu.(Shut up you.)" Forgetting the off-putting feeling of everything that he had conjured to not support this, to brush this off and ignore those feelings, he had subjected himself to it again. While he knew it was wrong, he couldn't fathom what his brother had said. He wouldn't be able to live with himself without being able to be around David, without seeing him, making sure he was okay, checking upon him. Just having him around was a pain but it could be wonderful at times too, including the times where they used each other's body heat to warm themselves, or when they'd sit down and watch tv while drinking a cold beer, and playing baseball together. 

</p><p>"Why? Is it because I'm right?"

</p><p>A backhand came right for the face of David, with no time to dodge it, his head went flying to the other side of the wind, the light from the street poles nearby curling around their bodies. A little grunt escaped his fleshed lips as Javier began walking inside.

</p><p>"Oh come on, don't act grumpy, we aren't children anymore Javi." Javier didn't even turn around, instead, he huffed. What was the problem now? He had finally admitted to the colorful feelings they shared but of course, not a lip kiss. (At least not yet.) Their love was in some form of flight, it was getting somewhere, and that was a starting point. Anything better than nothing was a relief in his mind, so he was put at ease that his brother was coming to terms with what was happening.

</p><p>"Tomorrow, we should go out again, at least do something again, and this time, like a couple, as it should have been." David offered even though Javier kept walking up the stairs, but not before saying something that made David jump or joy.

</p><p>"Let's not go anywhere, just staying inside the house will do the trick. Maybe we can watch a movie together and cuddle up?" Voice soft with mild duration, David punched the air while following Javier up the stairs.

</p><p>But even though things were looking welly for the long run ahead of the three, Gabe, Javier, and David, there was always that steeling thought in the back of Javier's head, he was still worrying about everything. Even though he was out of the army, he'd still bane the thought of David's death. It never left, it only subsided for the moments of the ten years since his army days, but he could never forget. there was always danger out there. he often would compare it to a block of hay. There was always that sickening conviction, There was Always A Needle In The Haystack.</p>
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